I’ve just returned from a 4 day trip to the wilderness of OppiKoppi – a South African rock festival held in the middle of nowhere in Limpopo.
The whole experience has left me in quite a weird state of mind.
Ironically peaceful – considering I’d just spent the past few days jumping up and down in dust, holding onto people of questionable levels of hygiene, listening to what many people find to be loud, chaotic music.
Sitting at my desk at work, after such an experience, I feel different.
Truthfully, I’m no different from how I was before I left last week – but I feel like, for a while, I’d stepped outside of the four walls of adult life, and got to surround myself with boundless nothingness.
The nothingness of mind, more than matter. No worries, no responsibilities, no option for vanity, no attachment to material wealth.
Yet despite this “nothingness”, I was full. Filled to the brim with something other than the day-to-day drudge that threatens to drag us all down into the depths of reality.
Filled with something greater than reality. (And no, I’m not talking about drugs).
Perhaps it is better described as a feeling of indifference.
There’s a massive draw to being surrounded by people who aren’t all about keeping up appearances.
It’s a bit of a blanket statement, because where thousands of people gather, there will no doubt be a host of conflicting world views and motivations.
But at least on a superficial level (and by my limited experience of people in attendance) everyone is on the same level – rich, poor, young, old, black, white, fat, thin. People from all walks of life sort of just…being.
Sure, not everyone was of the same mind – or even of sound mind – but even amongst the most drugged out and stuck-up of people attending, there was no escaping circumstance.
Now when faced with the four-walled realities once again…I just feel different. Like I’m surrounded by people who just don’t quite “get” it.
I don’t feel like being a part of this race. The never-ending hunt for status. Keeping up appearances. Fighting for popularity. Joining the legion of the must-haves.
It’s difficult to describe my mind space without coming off as a “self-enlightened” twat – but it does feel like I’ve awakened to new outlook in life. Like I know what kind of people I want around me, and what kind of sense of self I’d like to achieve.
The feeling is fleeting. And will no doubt dissipate with time. But I hope the perspectives last beyond the incoming barrage of the real world.
But for now, I’m sitting in a blissful haze of indifference to the world and all its goings on. Feeling at peace with just being.
It’s amazing what can happen in 4 days.